2 Post 1 Day

Well, it's not the end of the day, yet; so I thought I'd write another post since I'm a bit behind. It's been a pretty good day, and I plan on making it even better.

I got to see Big Girl and Little One for about an hour and a half today. That was fun. I introduced both of them to Craisins. They like them! Big Girl and I played for a good long time. We laughed a lot, too. Little One likes "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious." Big Girl likes "I Love to Laugh."

I have a ton of homework to do by Monday. Thank God for the snow days this week. I needed a break already. I'll do some of it tonight.

I'm kinda down right now, but "The Big Bang Theory" will be on in less than half an hour, so I know that I'll cheer up soon. There's always some sort of stuff going on in my life that puts me off-kilter. It's a good thing that I'm taking Yoga and T'ai Chi Chih. These will help me maintain my balance and regain my strength.

It's really hard for me, and from what I've heard, other moms to cut the ties with their adult children. It right before they graduate from high school and continues on for however long it takes the moms to cut the cord. It reminds me of weaning foals. Lots of drama and wailing. I think it is easier if the "foals" are "out-of-sight/out-of-mind." I don't know. I'm just trying to discipline myself to focus on my own life. It goes really well sometimes, but most times it's excruciatingly heart-wrenching and confusing. I'm somewhere between heart-broken, furious and extremely empty inside. Again, it is good that I am taking Yoga and T'ai Chi Chih.
They are helping me force myself to focus on my life. I just want the pain to go away.

Course, it's not just the adult children that concern me. I am constantly thinking about what I'm going to do for a job, evaluating my life, and wishing that I had done things differently; so that, I could take care of everyone that I love. I told my Yoga teacher that I must have been a murderer, rapist and terrorist in my past life because I sure seem to be paying for something this time around. Her response set me back.

"Well, if you believe in reincarnation," she said, "then you know that you chose this life to work through your karma."

I'm not sure I believe in reincarnation.